Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Peru part 4: Macchu Piccu.

We got up early for our trip to Machu Piccu. We waited in the cold for a half an hour or so by the Iglesia de San Blas (San Blas Church) to get picked up. When we finally get picked up we start to get to know our tour group. Our fearless leader and guide: Justino. What seem like a couple of 30 something lesbians from St. Louis, one is ex military and spent a time working in Antarctica, there is a gaggle of four Asians (sorry C I stil have trouble telling folks apart) from LA there’s a freckled one, one who carries around a gigantic camera, and two whom I could not tell apart if my life depended on it, rounding out our group is Justin a muscle-head from Venice Beach working in advertising and is eager to pose for photos with his shirt off. Justin was interesting… normally I hate dudes like this, but this guy had a ease about him, nonjudgmental, and funny as shit, I begrudgingly had to admit I liked the guy in spite of myself.


The Trail Group


On the trip to the train station Justin talked about getting sick repeatedly cause of the bad food in Peru, which both Rachel and myself found humorous considering how well we hd been eating. We got to the train station and had to wait a while… so I asked Justino, our guide, what was up with the rainbow flag. He told me it was just the official flag for Cuszco and it had fertility significance. The conversation turned to homosexuality in general and his theory (Not sure if this was just Justino or if it is a common belief in Peru) was interesting. He said there weren’t so many gays in Peru four five years back, but then Peru got the cell phones and other up to the minute technological do-hickkeys. So the technology makes the gays. I’m guessing this theory wouldn’t hold up to scientific study, but it is an interesting bit of logic.

The Train to Machu Piccu was fairly uneventful as the Asian girls spent most of their time taking pictures of a gummy bear in various paper made clothing and vehicles. We got off the train @ km 106 of the Inca Trail, our original disembarking location was meant to be km 104, but due to a fire plans got changed. The hike was rigorous. From 104 the path meanders up to the Inca trail proper, from km 106 the path to the Inka trail is straight up a bunch of switchbacks. It was a beautiful view but also it kicked the shit out of me. I’m happy to say I wasn’t the last to make it but I was far from the first.


Rachel on the Inca Trail, you can see the burnt mountain side on the right.

When we got to our destination a sort of clubhouse on the side of the mountain I was soaked clear through. I couldn’t help but got bare-chested I was so soaked through. I figured I’d earned a cigarette. And all the ladies out there will be happy to know that Rachel got this damn sexy picture of me.



Hot Damn!

Before lunch we caught a farming ruins that was fairly impressive. The most interesting bit was how the Inca farmer would slowly move crops up the steps preparing the plant for colder and colder climates. They used essentially used natural selection on the plants breeding plants that were more and more capable to grow in colder temperatures.


Inca Farming Ruins.

Lunch was a little scary… I think I was the only person in the tour group to clean my plate. Then it’s off to the sun gate and Machu Piccu. We had like a two-hour walk to the Sun gate which was much less difficult than the hike up the side of the mountain. Rachel and I took it easy and found ourselves at the back of the tour group where our second guide “eddie” walked way to close to us with a walking stick…. Annoyingly going click, click, click at my feet. Rachel was walking behind me so eventually I just let her get in front of me and I walked especially slow to give her some separation.


Steep Stairs on the Trail.

The Sun Gate gave a beautiful view of Machu Piccu, but the sun was not in the right spot for a good picture. The walk down to the bus gives more views, it’s all pretty awesome. I’ll let the pictures speak for themselves.


View Walking down from the Sun Gate.

We spent the night in Aguas Calientes a beautiful and romantic little tourist town at the foot of Macchu Piccu. We wandered the streets as much as our very tired feet and legs could take us, and enjoyed the nightlife as well as these two adorable dogs fighting.
They look snarly but they were definitely buddies.

We had to get up early to go to the city proper of Machu Piccu. Again it’s just so stunning. Here are some pictures.

The Mist Rolls in During the Morning

A Tree grows in Machu Picchu





Our Fearless Leader Justino






Machu Picchu in the morning


Llama attack!!!!

After wandering the site for three hours or so we headed back into town for lunch. Rachel was unimpressed with the group diner the night before so we went out for lunch. Most of the restaurants in Aguas Calientes (or anywhere else in Peru for that matter) have someone out front with menus begging you to come it (it’s off putting). We stopped at the one place that didn’t have that person hounding you in the street. We ordered and then we found out why this particular restaurant didn’t have one, they had a parrot. “Hola” “Hola” the bird says “Comida Bien!” “Tomas bebitas!” It was adorable. Close to the end of the meal it fell off it’s perch and cam scrambling on the ground, the waitress tried to pick it up but the parrot was having none of that. After scampering up a chair and getting onto our table the Parrot finally got what it wanted all along… Rachel’s Pizza.



Parrot Attack!!!!!!

After saying bye to the group we headed off to our fancy train… “The Vistadome.” At first we were none to impressed the car we got in was stuffy and it just had these glass windows. The menu seemed spectacular (garlic and herb bread sticks, pork tenderloin and farmer cheese sandwich, mini banana cheesecake) but when they brought us our food it was teenny tiny portions of bad food. The disappointment grew the views were nice, but the entertainment… the entertainment was the most surreal experience of the trip. A guy came out wearing a ski mask, some traditional clothes, a rectangle hat and began touching people with a sheep puppet. He did that Russian dance where he kicks up one foot after another with folded arms. Then there was a fashion show where the two attendants the steward and stewardess changed into different articles of clothing and walked up and down the isle while the riders clapped. Rachel and I just about completely lost it, I remember turning to Rachel and asking through tears of laughter “why are we clapping”… through the same tears of hysterical laughter Rachel responds “I have no Idea”.

When it got dark they turned off all the lights so you could see the stars above you trough the ceiling windows. The experience of the Vistadome was well worth the extra 30 or 40 bucks we paid. So if you go, go in style.




The Vistadome!


This is the entertainment on the Vistadome.



Why are we clapping?

When we got back to Cuzco it was fast and furious taking a bus to hotel to pick up are bags, then to another van, then to the bus stop. We sat on the front row of a double-decker fancy bus and watched a movie about a boy and his cheetah (Duma). The ride was fun but scary, luckily I had one Xanax left over to help me get through the terror of driving through mountains on a bus going 45 mph. We also become very aware that we both have colds by the time we hit the bus and tissue becomes one of our top ten concerns.

Next Stop Arequipa.

Peru Part 3: Cuzco

We had to drag ourselves up by 3 AM to get a ride to the airport. The flight was pretty packed, but uneventful. As soon as we got to the airport the vibe was different. It was cold, there were musicians serenading folks (and selling CDs of course) waiting to get their luggage from the carousel. Cuzco was both charming and repelling. Charming in the sense that it was beautiful old city filled with culture, repelling in that it was filled with western tourists and folks were economically driven to push their wares, their water colors, their alpacas, and their children on them for survival. The charming won out but their was always a sense that the place would be a little better if everyone would just leave (not true, it would fall into economic ruin).

The Narrow Streets of Cuzco.

Our cab driver had some trouble finding our hotel The Casa de la Gringa. It was a new agey place with fairies painted on the wall and a clear connection with some natural healing guru who can apparently get you really fucked up on some homemade hallucinogenics. Not exactly the perfect place for Rachel and myself cause on top of all that the room and bathroom sucked (it had 20 seconds .
Colorful clothing of Peru

As soon as arriving in the hotel we were off to find breakfast and we ate at this delicious bakery place called Cirrcolina. It might have been one of the most delicious smelling places I‘ve ever entered. Rachel had a cornbread, eggs and guacamole thing that was insanely tasty, as well as the tastiest beverage of her life, a hot chocolate that had 9 types of spices in it… yum. While we were having breakfast and writing postcards we first noticed the altitude sickness… which I dubbed Space Madness from the classic Ren and Stimpy cartoon (is that old enough to be classic?). Rachel wrote a post card and the text reads as follows:

Howdy
Peru is real. I likes. A lot.
Hot chocolate is
best $3 I ever spent.
Cusco is here - I am
lightheaded.

I added: I think Rachel is losing it.

From breakfast we headed over to SAS travel who we scheduled the trip to Machu Pichu through. We had to pay the remainder of our balance and they were informing us that a bunch of trips were canceled for the two days before we were going due to a nationwide strike over Peru taking the water supply private (Coca-Cola assholes making water too expensive for the average Peruvian to afford to water their crops) but that we should be fine. In the process of discussing the money we owed and the possibility of getting shut down entirely, the Space Maddness really hit Rachel and she just had to sit down (we didn’t know it yet but she was also developing a cold) while I ran out to get cash.

After taking care of that trip Rachel headed back to the hotel for a nap while I wandered about town. Cuzco was a very pretty town and they also have an interesting flag.
What a Fag...! I mean Flag!

After Rachel got up we got a coffee and a tea at a café. In front of the café were a shit load of tourists from the US and Europe, ya know the type 20-27, they don’t bathe cause they have to prove how much they can “rough it,” they talk whit about how worldly they are cause they spent the last 4 weeks in a foreign country (you have to read between the lines to add, in the most touristy place in the entire country, and a place where you can get laid and weed real easy). Well anyway this gaggle of youth was amusing to say the least but after a half an hour we were off to find a drink.
Dirty Young Tourists Take in the View

We ended up at Norton’s Biker Bar. The place was kinda empty, which was fine with me. We had a few drinks, discussed one of our favorite topics to argue about, religion, and tried to name the many flags that were attached to the ceiling.

The Ceiling at Nortons


After that we went to Pacha Papa for dinner, we had Potato Cream Soup, Papas Rellenas (mashed potatoes wrapped around beef, raisons, carrots, and peas then deep fried), and a delicious alpaca steak skewer. I felt kind of odd ordering the alpaca after noticing how cute the little buggers were, but it was god damn scrumptious. After dinner we slipped off to bed early to our freezing bedroom with a window overlooking a path with constant loud drunk jackasses on it. It’s so cold that the room has at least 5 blankets and it’s still cold (partially cause Rachel keeps stealing all the covers.)

Cuzco, like Everywhere in Peru, has more than its fair share of Stray Dogs

The next day we take breakfast back at Norton’s and then go back to SAS as we have decided to plan out the rest of our trip with them. We then checked out an Inca ruin that Spanish monks built their monastery around. It was quite nice. Most of the day we just relaxed. I sat on a balcony overlooking the main square writing notes about the trip while sucking back cappuccinos and smoking Lucky Strike cigarettes. Rachel ran around and hunted down some lovely jewelry.


Pictures of the Central Square of Cuzco Taken from the Cafe on the Second Floor.


There were also the most absolutely adorable children playing with pigeons in the main square.




And of course we had to take a picture with the alpaca, only cost us a fiver.



Diner was another fantastic experience, we ate at Tanka Panka and had a potato dish with a peanut sauce, an unforgettable Avocado a la reina (avocado of the queen… which was avocados with the most delicious chicken salad flowing over the sides of it) and an alpaca tenderloin in a mushroom sauce. The highlight of the evening was the fact that these dogs were constantly playing around the table where we were sitting (well actually the one of the dogs was desperately trying to mount a smaller dog while a third dog watched) but this scene was broken up when a mule came burling around the corner and what I must assume is top mule speed (at least on narrow stone walkways) and sent everyone scattering.



And Some more of Cuzco:


Saddest Desert Ever

Nothing like a Lactating Virgin Mary

Hope I don't Catch It

When you're Walking down a Narrow Alley and looking to Your left you See This... it's Creepy

Most Insane Facial Hair on a Mannequin Ever

Peruvian Children our Cuter than Your Children.


Ain't we just adorable

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Peru Part 2: to and from Huarez


We got up the next morning hella early to get into a cab and go back to the airport to pick up the rental car. The cab driver had the weakest vehicle I’ve ever been in… good thing too cause the guy thought he was Mario fucking Andretti. He had some interesting evil looking bobble head jobbies on his dash.

When we got o the airport it became clear that the airport was not where the Car Company was. After quite some help from a friendly gentleman (can’t say enough about the folks of Peru they wee wonderful) and some spilt coffee the Car Company came to get us. When we got to the Budget/EuropCar place they seemed very confused. I booked through a third party and they definitely had issues with it. “No drive Mechanico?” was repeatedly asked of us. I had arranged through a 3rd party cause I needed and Automatic with unlimited mileage… so after some conversation and an hour or so of waiting we set off in an automatic Toyota Yaris with the worlds most annoying alarm (kept going off at inopportune times). In total we estimated the drive to be 6-8 hours.

Driving out of Lima was not nearly as harrowing as we thought… we found our way without much trouble… The construction in Lima was spectacular. Entire four lane roads were closed off and they shunted the traffic off through dirt parking lots. Then we got to the Pan American Highway and slowly but surely left Lima behind. We climbed up a mountain shortly out of Lima and got to drive through clouds rolling in off the Pacific driving through clouds is surreal to say the least.
Clouds are down and to the left in this picture.

As we got out into the countryside we started to get stopped by police officers. They wave us over and usually get a little smile out of our poor Spanish, but they are friendly and nice, offer us directions (“Huarez?” picture me pointing further down the road,) and seem sincerely surprised that these Americans are attempting to drive in their potholed country.

We turned off the Pan American Highway and meet our last officer who was especially nice and set us on our way. We began driving steadily in an up hill direction. And drove that way on switchbacks for roughly the next 2 hours. The first item of interest we came across was fields and fields of chili peppers... which was stunning against the colorless stone backdrop.














We stopped at a place that was clearly a pit stop for buses and let me tell you every one stopped to get a good look of the Americans in the rented car, It was one of the few times that the people of Peru made me feel uncomfortable in their country. Traveling up into the Andes mountains lead to some fantastic views, but the construction habits of the Peruvians leaves something to be desired… Instead of having cones to signal construction they just leave large rocks in the road. The first of which I hit with a loud “ka bam” as my wheel apparently just bounced up and over it. There were several stretches of one lane “road” (by road I mean pile of dirt) where their was being construction done to improve the road conditions.

After driving steadily in an assent to the top of the first mountains of the Andes we hit a plateau. Hungry we stopped in a town with a slew of paces with signs that read Queso… so we stopped and bought some bread and farmer’s cheese. It was delicious… It got dark quickly as a storm rolled in and delivered the only rain we experienced while we were in Peru. Rachel took a nap as I completed the last hour to Huarez, swerving to make a herd of sheep jump over a barrier, swerving around potholes and folks with various farm animals and just enjoying the views.

After arriving in Huarez Rachel and I probably had our tensest moment on the trip as we attempted to fin our way to the hostel in the poorly marked city. When we finally get to the place it is quite beautiful. We have a view of the mountains from our little balcony, and there is a fantastic roof top view. We had some difficulty securing secure parking for the car but eventually our hotel hooked us up with a lady who’s walled backyard was available for overnight parking for what amounted to a buck fifty. We had dinner at Hotel Andino where Rachel ordered our first Pisco Sour and I had a delicious chicken stuffed with a Mushroom sauce.

View from our balcony when we arrived in Huarez

The next day we got up early eager to drive to Lake Llanganuco in the National Park of Huascaran… the power was out in Huarez, something that is fairly common, but we had a nice breakfast regardless. There is a clearly independently wealthy fella from Minneapolis running the place who is kind of a doutche. It’s odd that we come 6000 miles from home and the idiots we meet are most likely to be other Americans.

We drive about an hour north dodging potholes… and thus driving on the shoulder, in the middle of the road, pretty much anywhere there is actual road to drive on. We stopped in a town looking for a snack and Rachel met a nice lady who sold her bread and because she liked Rachel apparently, gave her the stalest croissant ever. After a little trouble finding the right road we were off up the side of the mountain in our automatic Toyota Yaris. The road was made of dirt and dust, and was clearly not leveled in ages…and thus it took us nearly 2 hours to go 25 kilometers up the side of the mountain. We got to the entrance of the park and got some corn con queso from a lady just sitting up at the top of the mountain. After another 15 minutes of driving we reached these two lakes, set at an elevation of 13,000 ft, surrounded by glacier-covered peaks. It was one of the most serene views of my life. We got the rowboat rental guy to let us take the boat out ourselves and we rowed around as Rachel took pictures of me trying to be funny.

The road was a little quicker going down and soon we were back in town. We headed out for some Pisco Sours and some Pizza. I can say that the pizza for the most par in Peru sucks… but Rachel is addicted so she made like 4 or 5 attempts. We also came across a bunch of places advertising Sex Burgers, which is essentially a cheeseburger with over easy eggs on them.

The next day we were heading back to Lima. It was uneventful, but even more fun than the ride up cause there was no longer a worry about getting lost. We got stopped by one of the same cops who stopped us on the way up who seemed sincerely happy that we were unharmed and still in good spirits. We attempted to stop several times for lunch but the section of the Pan American Highway between Huarez and Lima has quite a few places that as Rachel would put it “smell like death.” Eventually I had some delightful chicken at the Universal Restaurant.

AIN'T Rachel CUTE

Driving back into Lima was an absolute blast, Rachel seemed anxiety ridden but I was like a Pig in Mud. The Folks at the car rental place seemed surprised and a little ticked off that there was nothing wrong with the car when I brought it back, so they charged us $25 for cleaning the car cause it is filed with dirt road dust. A van takes us back to the Hotel Espana, and of course we head back to our new favorite restaurant where the nuns serve us more food. Rachel gets the same she had before and I get some delicious rabbit. We head home early cause we have to get up at 3AM to head to the airport for the next leg of our journey.